A good morning

Some days, you wake up on the right side of the bed and others I guess it's well, the left side of it. Today I woke up in the middle I guess. ( references to sides of the bed are not metaphorical but the actual reference to directional orientation of my body in relation to my bed upon waking up) In any case it's not important what side i woke up on but rather who woke me up. There I was, at the battle of pelennor fields with king Theoden and the Rohirrim (Lord of the Rings) when suddenly I was whisked away to the real world only to think I was in a dream again for it was her (E, the girl I'm in love with) that woke me. All the previous words serve no other purpose than to tell you that I had a splendid morning. If you didn't have one, be consoled by the fact that I did.

Dreaming my dreams......with you!

I used to be a dreamer, especially in matters of the heart. I don't know whether I still am. You know, you get your heart broken and then all that "happily ever after" stuff sounds like well just like it should, a fairy tale. My first crush was in my primary 7, there was this girl called J and one day I found myself thinking about her. My main fantasy was about kissing her but of course I couldn't do anything about it. It was primary, girls were to say the least mysterious and any advances by me would have gotten me in the hottest of soups ever. Incidentally it all remianed just that, a fantasy, but I remember the feeling! It was exhilarating! Two years later I was back at it, this time it was this girl I had known since I was about 9. They were letters involved and I got as far as a hug (ooooh!). But that too was put in my closet of crushes when she moved overseas, for good! We wrote each other some brilliant letters but as they say "out of mind....."
Then came the crush that crushed the dreamer in me. A case of unrequited love. It was in a word, heartbreaking. I used to believe that love could overcome it all, but I guess there was one big obstacle it couldn't. I will tell no more about that one.

So here I am today, much less of a dreamer than I was but in love once more. So am I still having dreams of forever, a little bit, but they are tempered by the reality of life. Not all dreams come true, but you can alyways hope and work toward them. But the worst thing about that dream crushing crush was that it made cautious in love. Not fully giving of myself. So how to overcome that? Because I must do it.

So little to do , so much time!

This saturday's proving to be too lousy, no soccer = nothing else to do. So here I am blogging. It's been a while since I blogged, England's exit from the world cup was a bit of a heartbreak and I couldn't find a satisying explanation or scapegoat for that matter. But like in all love affairs, life's got to go on, you either fix the problem and move on or u break up with some unsavory parting shots. I went for the fomer, I don't give up on relationships easily, Actually it's a taboo to support one club today and in a month's time you have shifted goal posts. Soccer promiscuity is a no no. You get one club and one country for life. Most men are more faithful to their football teams than to their spouses or girlfiends. For example, I wouldn't be caught dead donning an Arsenal shirt...but you could find me in the comapny of another girl other than my beloved.

The new superman movie is out, I have to go and watch it soon, maybe tomorrow. The reviews are good so far but I'm not one to pay attention to them when it involves Kal El (his kryptonian name).

A big sorry to someone for ignoring them sometime, I had to do it.

Now, what to do....what to do....

untitled

The rest of those who have gone before cannot, steady the unrest of those of us who follow.

In the absence of the sacred.

I am in no way superstitious. I've read too much crap to be that inclined. But sometimes you just have to wonder why some things always happen the way they do. For instance I have a friend who whenever he watches an Arsenal match, they never win, most of the time they lose...It got so bad that before their most recent game, Arsenal fans misdirected him and told him we were watching the game in some bar on the other side of town. He caught onto the ruse and showed up at the nook just in time for kick off. Arsenal promptly lost 2-1. So what is my point? None really, just thought i would share a story.

I had a very unfamilliar feeling today. I remember having something like it back when I was about 10 years old. My mom had gone out and it was getting late and I had this very heavy heart kind of sensation. I was worried that something would happen to her...I wanted her to come back immediately...I was not whole without her. I had that kind of feeling today, about someone who I haven't seen for a whole week. I think I'm falling deeper still.

Currently reading:

Abyssinian Chronicles by Moses Isegawa
A really good read, the fact that it's set in Uganda makes it easy to relate to. Humor and style of narration is very good as well.

His Dark Materials Trilogy by Philip Pullman
Started reading it bse, the reviewers compared Pullman to Tolkien and have to say I was not disappointed. Just finished book two *The Subtle Knife*. A must read for any fantasy fan.

Song currently obsessed with:

Deeper water by Minnie Driver

Something funny for you: It's so miserable being a millionaire!

Fight or Flight?

Wrapped up Grey's Anatomy Season 2 last week. It is my second best show ever, only to friends. It got very heart wrenching in the last 3 episodes. For the sake of not spoiling it for anyone, i won't say anymore but it's a must see.
There's another plus to watching grey's anatomy...i've discovered some really nice music. It's like every episode has some bloody nice song you've never heard. Two weeks ago I was obsessed with "In the Sun" by coldplay, last week it was "Chasing cars" by Snow Patrol, today I listened to "Somewhere only we know" by Keane and just lost it. Fiona you have to listen to those 3 songs and then add on

Don't Forget me: Way Out West
Wish I: Jem
Suitcase: Joe Purdy
Back Where I was: The Hereafter
Other Side of the World: KT Tunstall (very nice)
How to save a life: The Fray

Now I don't know which series I'm going to watch, I think I'll look into The 4400 or Smallville

Haemorrhage in my head!

I'm an England fan, infact it's the only team I'm supporting at the world cup. It has been my team for the last 7 years. We've been through, last minute penalties in Euro2K, broken metatarsals in 2002, Emile Heskey in 2004 and more broken metatarsals....and we have never parted ways. I will now call it she to better define my love for England. She has given me moments of unrestrained joy , like that time in Munich or that time with the greeks. I in return have proclaimed my love from the rooftops, willed matter and energy to move "the force" in our favor. At times it has obliged and other times darker arts have undermined our efforts. But on saturday I was totally mystified, I wondered whether the "Martians" had finally attacked earth and their first act was to replace the entire England team with zombies or worse. I spent the whole evening valiantly defending my beloved England as my friends poured forth their arsenal of words to describe the most appalling display on a soccer pitch.

I have a theory that Sven is out to get revenge, after all the English press has put him through, this is his last chance for payback. I won't be surprised if he names 11 defenders against Trinidad and Tobago.

But we will persevere, I will the fates as much that it is to my ability to do so...
"May the force be with us"

Evading the FRIEND ZONE!

I watched an episode of scrubs sometime, JD was about to kiss Elliot and then they were interrupted. His theory is that if something like that happens, whoever wants to take it forward (i.e. the guy) has 48 hours to complete the kiss or else the girl's gray matter will light up and chances are high that you will be condemned to the friend zone. If u don't know what the friend zone is, just listen to mario's "just a friend".
Incidentally, I find myself in a similar or worse predicament. There's this girl, I have a crush on her. I begin spending time with her and naturally I fall deeper. And then yesterday we almost kissed. Now, the problem is I'm not going to see her for a few days, so I have to be the single outstanding exception to JD's 48 hour rule. In case u were wondering what happened to JD, he was 1 second late and was thus condemned to the friend zone

As deceptively nice as the name sounds, The friend zone is among the top 5 things guys dread most. In simple words, it is torture. I've been there, twice. Not a very nice place to visit. I'm not ending up there this time.

FRAMED!: The all knowing God and free will!

I have a long running argument with almost all my friends, this centers around the concept of an all knowing God and free will. For the faint hearted, poor of spirit, easily offended, wrap-a-bomb-around-your-waist fanatics, and if you feel your faith is not strong enough please stop reading this now and go...well..do somethin else.

Apparently God is all knowing, simply put,he knows each and everything from the beginning of time unto the end of all things and I guess beyond that too. But most importantly God knows all that you shall ever do, all the decisions you will make from the moment you take in your first breath till the time you exhale your last. Your path has been chosen for you. Basically God knows what you will say, think and do after reading this....blah blah. So this begs the question, if he knows everything you will do, all the choices you will make from birth to death and obviously you cannot go against that, how then is it free will if when faced with a decision as simple as taking tea or porridge your choice is predetermined?

I mean, as a more complex example, God knew that I would be the way I am and do all the things I have done and will do until my candle burns out. He knew, from the beginning of time that;
1981: Enter Raymond
1986: Baptise Raymond
1996: Raymond becomes atheist
****: Raymond Dies
-----: Raymond burns in hell

I cannot defy this path. It was written for me ages ago. So I must walk it. So is it fair to say that I have free will?

Incidentally I gave up my belief in the christian God, hence

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find me, unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate;
I am the captain of my soul.
----William Ernest Henely

Everyone's a critic!

Ladies and gentlemen I present the next stage in evolution, homo sapien is no longer the dominant species....I give you..HOMO SUPERIOR!

The other day I was reading one of my favorite blogs and found Raymond had written crap about the new xmen movie. I was furious, actually I was going to write about it then but I figured I might display my more unsavory lingo. Anyway as u can tell by now, I'm a superhero freak. I loved the X Men movie and personally I think it was the best of the lot. I mean, the special effects were awesome! and let's face it, they are they main reason you'd go to watch it. And if you want a movie with a major plot, bloody hell! watch The English Patient! Enough ranting, the movie is brilliant, anyone who loves the X Men will enjoy it.

And coming soon!

By the way my crush's not subsiding, I need advice!

I wont have any kids because I feel sorry for the trees!

In the 1900s the population of Uganda was about 3M people and needless to say, most of the country was covered with equatorial forests. Fast forward to 1980s it was 15M and obviously little of the forests remained. Today it is estimated at 21M and the government just sold off several islands to investors for growing palm trees. This might seem like a useless piece of information but trust me if you drop it into a conversation, especially as an anwer to a question about how many kids you're planning to have, you'll look brainy. Inevitably you will intially come off as NUTS, but if you eloquenlty explain the relationship between population growth and the diminishing forest vegetation, you will emerge not only as intelligent but also as very knowledgable (if you wear specs, it is a good idea to nibble on them as if in thought and then wave them about while explaining your point).

I love Grey's Anatomy, the soundtracks are so lovely, they invoke all sorts of emotions in me. Here's one of my favorite songs on the soundtrack.

In the Sun - Coldplay ft Peter something

I picture you in the sun wondering what went wrong
And falling down on your knees asking for sympathy
And being caught in between all you wish for and all you seen
And trying to find anything you can feel that you can believe in

May God's love be with you
Always
May God's love be with you
I know I would apologize if I could see your eyes
cause when you showed me myself I became someone else
But I was caught in between all you wish for and all you need

I picture you fast asleep
A nightmare comesYou cant keep awake
May God's love be with you
Always
May God's love be with you
cause if I findIf I find my own way
How much will I find
If I findIf I find my own way
How much will I findYou

I dont know anymore
What its forIm not even sure
If there is anyone who is in the sun
Will you help me to understandcause I been caught in between all I wish for and all I need
Maybe youre not even sure what its for
Any more than me
May God's love be with you
Always
May God's love be with you

In your face Arsenal! Ha ha ha ha!

A wish upon a star!

I've got a crush! yes, a typical schoolboy ISN'T SHE BEAUTIFUL AND OH SHE SMILED AT ME dreamy eyes crush! I thought I was beyond these feelings because I think the last time I had one, Boyz II Men were ruling the charts and M7 and the Colonel were bosom buddies. So I'm riding the emotions, like a love sick puppy, thinking about writing love poems again. Thinking about her in every waking moment and on the verge of singing Uncle Sam's "when I see you smile." That's how bad it is. I noticed it when I couldn't get past hello..... and then I recognised those adolescent tinglings of the heart, tounge sticking in my mouth..etc. Oh what a feeling!

I saw a shooting star today and I made a wish. I wished that *omitted*. Anyway this week my theory holds tight. Lots of good stuff

1. I've got a crush on .......
Enough said already

2. Barcelona 2 Arsenal 1.
It was a magical night. I screamed till I went hoarse! By halftime, the Arsenal fans were about to eat the rest of us alive, but fate it seems is not without a touch of malice. First Eto'o then Belleti to bring out my basic baboon insticts. You should have seen me pounding my chest.

3. Mail from Di!
Hey Di, it's been a long time and was lovely to hear from you, especially that you have time to read my blog. And for the record my mind is like a jigsaw puzzle, i'm just tryin to put all the right pieces together.

4. Halfway thru my CISCO class
Going on to sem 3, though have like 11 tests to do but they're all online and not that difficult. I really want to finish this, it's the key to many doors.

5. Prison Break Episodes 20 and 21
Scofield and Co. finally break out of Fox river, but not without some tense moments. T Bag just cracks me up with his comments

6. Shooting star
And everything is written in the heavens...

So generally i've got a good feeling. I just finished the book I was reading, can't say I enjoyed it that much, though somehow I read it till the end so maybe there's something to it. Just going to start on Phillip Pullman's "His Dark Materials trilogy" from what I hear it's very good.

Downloaded some songs I heard while watching grey's anatomy, they're too nice. I particulary like Joshua Radin's music.

So in a week of, crushes, champions, shooting stars, escaped convicts and emails from the dearest of friends, I give you the quote of the week.

"Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for."
----Joseph Addison

Dentists and Spanish Authors

I've had a very unenjoyable (for lack of a better word)week all thanks to some useless byproduct of pondlife and a barnacle
So, I went to the dentist last week, ( on my least favorite persons in the world list, dentists are up there with taxi drivers and a few other unsavory groups of persons). Anyway I had to have this tooth extracted, the irony being that I had the same tooth worked on 3 years ago and apparently what was done to it then was supposed to last fifteen years. Anyway the idiot, happened to break the damn tooth during extraction and proceeded to torment me with various tools that one would find in an espionage torture kit. Let's just say that if I could I would put out a contract on him.

Naturally the tone was set for the rest of the week, pain, unrelenting pain capped off by bloody Liverpool snatching the FA Cup at the last moment. I won't write anymore about the week, but it's my personal opinion that if the christians packaged hell as full of eager, inexperienced dentists instead of some guy with horns and a pitchfork, they would have many more converts. I would be saved right now.

Got some book from a friend "A hundred Years of Solitude" by some spanish author (Gabriel Marquez), apparently it's one of Clinton's favourites. I'm halfway throught it and it's just, well, weird!

Abbas, my housemate, managed to convince me to go to the club on Saturday nite and strangely enough I enjoyed myself ( the only ray of sun this week).

I have a theory though, that when lots of crappy things happen to you at once, on top of the ones that had already been happening, your luck's about to turn. So I'm optimistic, I think this week is going to be good.

And here's a list for you
Potentially hazardous near earth objects coming to your neighborhood soon!

And a quote

"Return to the Earth if you should find that your heart is weary and your mind is troubled, only by going back to the beginning can you find the path"
----some guy in a movie.

....in such small measures, life may perfect be.

There are some small things that bring me incredible joy.

- Getting into my newly laid bed just after a cold shower

- Finding a loo when I'm dying to piss

- A very fast internet connection

- Putting on new underwear

- Finding a good download website

- Fixing a computer problem in less than 5 minutes

- A lingering kiss

- A word from Bre, Di or Dimples

- A handwritten letter

- A hot cup of coffee on a very cold day

- Watching Arsenal lose

- Dimples

- A good comic

- Comfortable shoes

O! Ye poor of spirit!

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 5:3

I want to understand what it means to be poor in spirit in the context that it is used in the verse above, I welcome all interpretations of it's meaning.

Much ado about nothing

Okay... let's see....where to begin.

Sunday: Woke up early (9am) for a sunday and read Tintin comics, it's amazing but they're still able to crack me up, especially the ones with Thompson and Thomson, Haddock and Calculus, I think my favorite is "Land of Black Gold"


Spent evening with Genie, who had thrown me out because her boyfie was getting jealous (I seem to do this a lot, I mean, make other people's boyfriends jealous!). We had a nice chat abt ****classified info***.

Monday: Did absolutely nothing, and I mean nothing!

Tuesday: Installed a Wi-Fi nic for a client, Read some networking notes, passed by the Nook, Went to Makindye to visit my aunt Becky. Was tormented by arsenal going thru to the final.

Called Shirley, who's been giving me the cold shoulder because...idon't know...but I suspect it because:- I can't express myself, can't say where I stand, she probably wants to know if we're in a relationship or not! Hey I don't know either! I think I need a manual!

Wednesday: Nothing, except, Barca 1 - 0 AC Milan, 24 episode 14. Yup that's it!

My Philosophy part 1

I once read or heard someone say "in the end only kindness matters". In my quarter century under this starry sky, I have had people be very kind to me for their own selfish ends and other reasons...but I've also had the joy of knowing the kindness of strangers. I've had people be kind to me with no apparent gain on their part. Infact my life is a testament to the kindness of strangers.


"We are each others' angels in the way that we answer each others' prayers, and we can also make each others' lives miserable." -------Jewel

My Dimpled friend!

I was having a lousy week, until yesterday when I got a call from Dimples (my friend Becky).

Becka! Becka! my dimpled friend,
With the sparkle in your eyes.
I will love you till time's end.

She always cheers me up, she's one of the most interesting and lively people I've ever met. And she also holds the interesting statistic of the only girl to have ever broken up with me before we even dated. Needless to say, we never did date. Plus she wrote some of the best letters I've ever. I think the one bad thing about email is that it killed letter writing. There are fewer things more romantic than a handwritten love letter.

Speaking of romance, i find myself lacking in that department. I've been told by very relaible sources that I have "comittment issues" and I don't express my feelings (and I thought I wore my heart on my sleeve). In my defence I am very commited....to certain things, viz; Man United, hating Arsenal, uh....and a lot of other things. And if you don't think I express my feelings, just piss me off!


The rest of the week was quite lousy, did a total of 9 tests in CCNA (networking course I'm taking). Other major highlights were
1. Downloading 4 gigs of comics
2. 24 Season 5 Episodes 8 - 13
3. That's about it really (I know you're thinkin if you were me you'd hang yourself! but sometimes it be that way)

Just finished reading "A short history of nearly everything" by Bill Bryson. A very interesting book, you'd be amazed the things you don't know about, well, "almost everything." For example, Sir Isaac Newton, spent half of his life practising Alchemy

**The common perception of alchemists is that they were pseudo-scientists, crackpots and charlatans, who attempted to turn lead into gold, believed that the universe was composed of the four elements of earth, air, fire, and water, and spent most of their time concocting miraculous remedies, poisons, and magic potions.**

All in all, the book is an interesting read, it helps you stock up with a lot of junk history that you can always through into an argument and look very brainy.

Quote: "Never deny a woman pleasure"
---Bams

Superman and the songstress

Been listenig to Natalie Merchant's Ophelia album, she's just too good, she pulls you into the music. I especially like the songs, "King of May, When they ring the golden bells, The living."

Just downloaded 2 gigs of comics! I'm sooo excited, The Avengers, Xmen, Star Wars Republic....etc.